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Hi.

Our thumbs are basically numb from texting back and forth 24/7 about everything we love (AND HATE) that's happening on our televisions, iPads, and eye glasses (hi, we think we're funny) and we thought WHY NOT SHARE THIS JOY WITH THE WORLD?!  

IS PERSONALIZED SHAMPOO WORTH THE CASH? WE REVIEW PROSE HAIRCARE

IS PERSONALIZED SHAMPOO WORTH THE CASH? WE REVIEW PROSE HAIRCARE

I’m here to tell you what I think about Prose custom made haircare because I am what Facebook calls an “engaged shopper” and I buy things off of social media. You’re welcome.

Prose is custom made shampoo, conditioner, and hair mask. To get started, you take a short quiz about your hair and hair goals. Then, bleep bleep blop, magic happens. The quiz asks basic questions about hair texture and styling routines, but it also has some lifestyle questions: do you work out? Indoor or outdoor? What’s your diet like? (I’m pleased to say there is an option that says Unrestricted, which is how I’m going to live my life from now on.) What’s your zip code? That last question is important, as Prose takes into account environmental stressors like humidity, wind, sun, and pollution when crafting your products.

Me: thin, fine hair with the goals of body and smoothness. Here is the first place I tripped up with Prose. The first time I took the quiz, I may have not answered quite correctly. I went whole hog and ordered all three products. I was mildly happy with my results, but not blown away. When it was time to reorder, I took the quiz again (which had been revised just a little bit) and ended up with better answers and much better products. I also changed from the signature scent to Ispahan (Lychee, Rose, Raspberry). I just found out that they have seven scents, but only offer three that are tailored to your hair type. Some of them sound amazing!

Spoiler alert: I really like this shampoo and conditioner. Since I answered the questions correctly, I get compliments on my hair! My routine is very simple: wash, blow dry, sometimes a little product. Most of the time, I wear my hair up, being an English professor who lives in the windy desert. I will say that I have fewer days like that, and more days with my hair down. And on those days, people (women) remark on my hair. It has body and shine and that sort of careless beauty I associate with mid 90s supermodels. My hair smells good, but not overpowering, and I’m really happy.

I have oily roots and dry ends, and Prose wanted me to only shampoo every other day. For me, I just can’t. I know it’s bad, but I toss and turn at night and wake up like a New Yorker cartoon harridan. And if I do wrangle my unwashed hair, I go around all day knowing that my hair is not clean and rapidly turning into an oil slick. I’m sure that if I toughed it out I could be among you beautiful twice a week shampooers, but I have too much on my plate to make that transition at the moment!

Speaking of too much on my plate: the hair mask is that. You’re supposed to use it twice a week, and it is supposed to sit on your hair for fifteen minutes. This is incompatible with my lifestyle. I cannot more than double the time I spend in the shower and/or in my bathrobe, with wet hair. I also misrepresented my hair the first time, so the hair mask is probably not really right for me. I’ve just finished my second bottle of shampoo and conditioner, and ordered the third. I considered popping for the mask, but like I said, it just doesn’t make sense for me. If you are a luxuriator or a bathing beauty, the mask might be your jam.

Let’s talk about price. The shampoo and the conditioner together are $50. Add the mask, and you are looking at over $80 worth of hair care. Whoof! That’s a lot of money, maybe. I like hair products and I’ve been searching my whole life for a product that just makes my hair look amazing with zero effort for me. I’m also a bougie bitch who is willing to spend $50 on shampoo. I will say that each bottle lasts about two months, although I tend to run out of conditioner before I run out of shampoo.   

Here’s the bottomline: if you want to spend a pretty penny on haircare, and you are self-aware enough to answer the quiz questions correctly, and you want to feel special everyday because your shampoo and conditioner have your name and zip code on them, and you want women to tell you your hair looks beautiful, maybe you should give Prose a shot.

OLD DOGS (RHOBH RECAP)

OLD DOGS (RHOBH RECAP)

IT'S A MASS EXODUS (BACHELOR RECAP)

IT'S A MASS EXODUS (BACHELOR RECAP)