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Hi.

Our thumbs are basically numb from texting back and forth 24/7 about everything we love (AND HATE) that's happening on our televisions, iPads, and eye glasses (hi, we think we're funny) and we thought WHY NOT SHARE THIS JOY WITH THE WORLD?!  

WE RANK ALL THE SONGS ON THE A STAR IS BORN SOUNDTRACK

WE RANK ALL THE SONGS ON THE A STAR IS BORN SOUNDTRACK

#1: Shallow

Jeremy: This is totally the best. The most magical moment in the movie (AND MY FAVORITE) is when BC starts the music and tells her to come on stage with him to sing this. I actually screamed in the theater … GOOOOOOOOOO. I loved it so much. When she does that major Gaga thing in the middle I die every time. I rewind that like 900 times every morning in my car and make a real ass of myself singing it as loud as I can. LOVE.

ADRIENNE: Jeremy, even my 9 year old son LOVES this song. I still get chills from it. The way Gaga covers her eyes while singing it is PERFECTION. That whole sequence is like the movie musical at its most powerful - ALL THE FEELS. I can still get chills scream-singing it in the car. Ahhhhh-ahhhhh-aaaaaaa-hhhhhhhhh! And I love the metaphor of jumping into the deep end for falling in love. You just don’t know what’s going to happen, do you? Probably terrible things! But you jump anyway. LOVE.

JEREMY: Oh my god. I forgot about the eye cover. (BURSTS INTO TEARS)

#2: Maybe It’s Time

ADRIENNE: We disagree on the ranking of this one but Imma let Bradley have his goddamned moment at the top of the list and you’re gonna learn to love it. FIGHT ME. I love this song. It’s simple and beautiful and it makes me want to bone Jackson Maine all over his cute little Californian bungalow. Let him mumble at me with his dirty hair forever and then play your little acoustic guitar and be all existential and shit. INTO IT.

JEREMY: OK. I need to tell you that I didn’t give one single shiz about The Coop before this movie. AND. While I love him and have added him to my “I would give a kidney to this person to save their life” list . . . I have a confession . . . I skip all of his songs when listening in my car. I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW. But I just listened to it to see how it was and it’s a really good one. I like it. So. APPROVED. (for now).

ADRIENNE: Honestly, I think this song is what saves Jackson Maine from being a joke. It’s simple and beautiful and existential and I love when Willam is like just look at me when you sing it. YES, PLEASE. This scene is also when Willam calls Shangela out for wearing a “bus driver wig” and it’s like everything that’s happening in this whole sequence I loved so much. I also listen to this song on repeat. Maybe it is time to let the old ways die, Jackson, maybe it is.

#3: Always Remember Us This Way

ADRIENNE: I love this song because it feels like a real full-on Gaga song.

JEREMY: GAH. So good. It breaks my stupid little heart. This is a better love song than that thing with the brown hair and the weird dress at the end.

ADRIENNE: One hundred thousand percent agree. This is the jam. Gaga would put this on an album without a movie and I love this one.

#4: I’ll Never Love Again

ADRIENNE: All I can say is, what was the fucking dress and hair she was wearing when she sings this song I can’t get over it.

JEREMY: Yeah. I guess we’re supposed to see that she’s decided to do what’s right for her instead of listening to that monster producer? BUT LIKE. She’s clearly got a gaggle of gays and I’m not sure any of them would let her wear that dress. Also? It’s cool when they break in with a real moment in the middle of the song in the movie but on the soundtrack and like in my car … it sounds nuts. AND? Stop showing me how BROWN HAIR is for normal people or whatever. ALSO ALSO … this song is aiiiight. It’s no Evergreen from the Babs 70s version of A Star is Born. That shit makes me weep. It’s the song I walked down the aisle to when I got married. YEAH BITCH I HAD A SONG.  

ADRIENNE: Look, it’s a good song, it’s just not as epic for me as the top three. And she has like a sort of Whitney Houston phrasing moment in there. Did you notice that?

JEREMY: Mmmmhmmm. Why did they do that do that do that do that to her styling though?? (hi. this is a segue.)

#5: Why Did You Do That

ADRIENNE: “Why'd you come around me with an ass like that?” is the best line in all of songwriting history. I LOVE IT. It’s so stupid, I say it all the time now. I said it to my friend Rachel yesterday and she was like “huh” and I was like get it together, see the movie, gah.

JEREMY: This is ridiculous. It proved that Gaga could sing fart noises for 45 minutes and I’d buy it and call it gold. I’d even sing along. Why did you that do that do that do that do that to meeee. I can’t help it. LOVE.

ADRIENNE: I mean it’s so confusing because i think it’s sort of like supposed to be bad but I still like it. But I also sort of think it’s like Gaga proving a point - good pop music is fucking hard and worthy of admiration. This song made me think about all of Gaga’s pop and I was like, that shit really is exceptional. POKER FACE, BIOTCH.

#6: I Don’t Know What Love Is

ADRIENNE: I like when they sing together and are melodramatic, i don’t care, i do, I love it. It’s like when in the Cutting Edge and they skate together it just pushes all my romance buttons so hard.

JEREMY: OMGAH. I’ve been singing this every morning when I get up. I’m obsessed. Yeah. This makes me heart explode.

#7. La Vie En Rose

ADRIENNE: I know I’m supposed to care, but I don’t.

JEREMY: SCREAMS. Adrienne! Go to your room. This is actually my favorite, but I think it’s just a gay thing. Lol. Did you know! (This is in Gaga’s interview in Vogue) The Coops was at a party where Gaga performed this song and it was so good and life changing he decided he had to ask her to be in the movie AND he knew she had to perform this song. It sorta even changed the script and that’s where that whole gay moment at the beginning came from. THIS IS MY FAVORITE. I wish I could learn the words.

ADRIENNE: Of course I knew that, I’ve read all about the benefit where she sang this song and the spaghetti she put in the microwave for him and how they sang at her piano. One thing I loved from all those interviews was that they made a pact that he was a singer and she was an actress and I think that support is beautiful and their chemistry was amazing.

JEREMY: BREAKS GLASS

#8: Is That Alright?

ADRIENNE: Treacly.

JEREMY: This is so fun to sing in the car. I WANT YOUUUUUUUUUU TO LOOK RIIIIGHT IN MY EYEEEEEEEES. This is way up there for me.

ADRIENNE: You just want to scream a big note, I see you.

#9: Diggin My Grave

JEREMY: This one is growing on me. At first I was like who cares, but I’m into it. I think maybe just because, well, GAGA, and also the chorus makes me laugh. YOU BEEN OUT ALL NIGHT DIGGIN MY GRAVE. It’s country but with Gaga sparkle … which is basically my favorite thing on planet Earth. Oh, have I told you I’m a Gaga fan yet? I wasn’t sure.

ADRIENNE: I like this one. This feels like Jackson Maine to me, his fans would be super into it, so I like that authenticity. And I can’t lie, B Cooper’s voice makes me hot.

#10: Look What I Found

JEREMY: You can’t give me snapping in a song and think I’m gonna be mad at it. This one is light I guess, but then she sings her own back up near the end and I’m like YES GIRL YOU BETTA GIVE ME THAT FALSETTO WEIRDNESS. YESSS. Look what you found. I see. Mmmmhmmm.

ADRIENNE: This is just ok for me. It’s not super cool or super ballad-y, what is it. Like a little jazzy number? Meh.

#11: Heal Me

JEREMY: This one sounds like straight up GA MF GA to me. I’m like how was this not one of her albums already? I’m into it, but it’s way more Gaga than Ally. It sounds maybe like this is what she wrote after they cut The Cure from the movie. PS. That song was clearly cut from the movie. It sounds like Ally. Go listen to it right now.

ADRIENNE: More snapping! Ally loves some snapping. This is not my favorite, it’s bad pop.

#12: Black Eyes

JEREMY: I mean fine. I know this is supposed to establish BC as like a rocker or whatever, but it’s too hard for me. Also? He says OPEN really weird when he’s singing it and I’m no singing teacher but it’s fucked up and I can’t deal with it. I skip this one. GIVE ME GAGA.

ADRIENNE: I sometimes listen to this one just to get back into the mindset of this movie, hahahahaha. Like i might listen to this before Shallow and Always Remember, etc. I thought he was real hot in this scene so I don’t mind living that fantasy.

#13: Music To My Eyes

ADRIENNE: Generally I cannot get behind these sort of mixed metaphors. WHAT THE FUCK DOES IT MEAN?

JEREMY: LOLOLOL Yeah. I can’t ever get past that first line. You’re music to my eyes? Shut up. Are you high? Quit it, Coops.

#14: Hair Body Face

JEREMY: This song embarases me. I can’t even talk about it. Why did they make her sing this?

ADRIENNE: I don’t understand this song at all. The whole Hair Body Face Triple Threat thing is like a bad Revlon commercial.

#15: Out of Time

JEREMY: The drums are nice at the beginning and all but like shut up and sing, y’all. Every time I’ve tried to give this one a chance in the car I feel duped when it get to the end because I’m sitting there waiting for singing like a dummy.

ADRIENNE: Agreed. Too short, why is it here, I always want more because I want a million more songs of these two singing together.

#16: Before I Cry

ADRIENNE: I hate this song.

JEREMY: SAME. You know she can put a spell on me but every time this starts I’m like nah girl, zip it.

#17: Too Far Gone

JEREMY: Meh. He says arms so weird I get grossed out and skip to the next song every time. Apparently I have a thing about singing diction. Hi I have an MFA in performance. Lol

ADRIENNE: It’s also too whiney. There’s a fine line between the existential dread of Maybe it’s Time and the whiney alcoholic in Too Far Gone. I like my man damaged but functional.

#18: Alibi

ADRIENNE: I hate this song, it’s like everything that’s bad about country music. I don’t lie without an alibi? Misogynistic drivel! But they did squeeze some daddy issues in it to serve the story so i guess that was good.

JEREMY: Where’s Gaga. He sounds fine and all but who cares. It’s some corny country music bs.

ADRIENNE: It’s SO CORNY.

THE THINGS JACK CARRIED (THIS IS US RECAP)

THE THINGS JACK CARRIED (THIS IS US RECAP)

HIT PAUSE: WHAT IS GOING ON WITH THIS IS US??? (THIS IS US RECAP)

HIT PAUSE: WHAT IS GOING ON WITH THIS IS US??? (THIS IS US RECAP)